Tim has had a good idea there; you might be able to do a version yourself..I did this once to diagnose a leaking head gasket on an old ford 6...sounds shonky as but it works...OK, what you do is this - remove your top radiator hose, get a pushbike inner tube with the valve bit still in it and cut it so you end up with a hose a bit longer than your rad hose so the valve is still in that section - put it in place of the rad hose and tighten with hose clamps as you would normally for a rad hose. If you then pressurise this with a bike pump (!) or a compressor - but keep below 25 - 30 psi or so - remember your cooling system isn't designed for big pressures!
Then, shut off the compressor, move it somewhere else so you can't hear any air from it or whatever and put your ear over the open neck of the carby or throttle body - you are listening for air that has made its way into the cylinder and is escaping via open inlet valves - if exhaust is off you can do the same at exhaust manifold but carby is easier. Also worth looking around the mating surface of the head itself on the block - this is actually where I detected my leak - it can help to have a squirt bottle of soapy water to spray around this joint to give the air something to bubble thru and therefore be more visible...

meaning i actually used nulon engine flush and let it drain for ages haha

Well today it had 2 FREEZING cold starts, no smoke at all on either of them...it just seems to do it randomly...

Thanks for the above suggestions, I do not have the tools or knowledge to do those things though...do you guys have any mechanics you can recommend for me to get to check it out, or is it not worth it? After resorting to a random mechanic for a couple of issues on my 180sx I am VERY VERY wary of mechanics' abilities...i swear I knew more than that guy, and in all honesty I really don't know very much apart from the basics...he actually screwed up a bunch of things, and I had to spend ages on the phone to managers etc to get them to eventually send out someone else to fix all the other guys problems (didn't plug some things back in, didn't screw bits on properly etc etc, caused an epic vacuum leak which f**k with the turbo)

Paul09, this might be the point to start having a look - its really the only way to learn..I reckon I hit the same point of frustration with mechanics and thought stuff it - how hard can it be? I started off with small stuff, these days I change engines, suspension, you name it...

Get yourself a cheap compression tester ($20) and check each cylinder, see if the rings are gone or cracked head/gasket. Probably wouldnt hurt to replace the oxy sensor too as it has a lot to do with your fuel delivery once warmed up, could explain the stalling. Subaru sell a great top end cleaner spray it into the intake plus in the spark plug holes right onto the piston head, helps free rings but most likely wont fix the problem.

tell your mate to take it to a mechanic or throw a match in it

Tightened the alternator belt today, screeching on startup all gone AND oil pressure problem on startup gone!

But still blew epic smoke this morning.

Been monitoring coolant and oil. I'm fairly sure it's not losing coolant, couldn't see a difference over the past couple days. Oil, well it could be losing it a little bit? But the smoke definitely isn't blue and if it is losing oil it's not losing much, I'll keep checking levels and see how it goes

highly recommend pressurising cooling system and if you think its oil doing a compression test...

is it blowing epic amounts like this ???
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YigTWRwMdJ4

Yes exactly like that, but doesn't start till about 10secs after turning engine on an only lasts 20-30secs. My smoke is whiter too

in my case the rings were fried...